Written by Pterodromae Cahow at 18:34 24/8-2017
While Engelhardt is busy making plans to get his Kickstarter campaign off the ground, absolutely no one was wondering what Pterodromae Cahow were doing about the Engelhardt situation. Even so, one unofficial spokesperson for the team, Will le Coeur, believed it was necessary to explain that the attention of the Storm Petrels is currently turned elsewhere. Apparently, former rider Connor Paullin is preparing to sue Pterodromae Cahow for wrongful termination of his contract. Paullin was forced to retire after never regaining the race shape he had during his time at Pterodromae Cahow and allegedly demands compensation. According to Will le Coeur, however, the real story might be rather different.
Nobody knows where Connor Paullin came from when he appeared as a twenty-something rider. Everybody knew, however, that Paullin did not have the talent to contribute to the development of cycling in his native Bermuda. Even so, he wanted to be part of a professional cycling team and Pterodromae Cahow decided to hire him to perform small jobs for the team. Paullin gratefully accepted the offer and joined the Storm Petrels. In the beginning it seemed like a win-win situation, but after some time Paullin would get annoyed by his role in the team and started to demand training. In response, Pterodromae Cahow terminated his contract, after which Paullin repented and was accepted back in the team. This happened time and time again, and eventually it would become a regular cycle.
All of that would change, however, when Pterodromae Cahow decided to implement the Aesthetically Appealing Alliterations and Activities Act (AAAaAA) of Season 41. For no reason whatsoever, the general public demanded that riders who were hired to perform jobs would have first and last names that start with the same letter, and inexplicably the Storm Petrels decided to placate their fans and implement this policy. After hiring Ebenezer Eccles and Basil Brake, the team let Connor Paullin go in order to meet the demands of their newly instated policy. When Paullin learned about the reason why he was fired, sources near Paullin said he immediately decided to sue his parents for being named Connor. Paullin is reported to have said: "If only they would have named me Paul. Paul Paullin... I would still ride for the Storm Petrels! But nooooo.... they had to call me Connor, and now I am out of a job! It's all their fault and I will SUE!"
As of yet, neither Pterodromae Cahow nor Mr. and Mrs. Paullin are being sued and it remains to be seen if any of this will come to pass. Moreover, Delmar Hallisey, the team's official spokesperson, has declared that no connection exists between Pterodromae Cahow and Will le Coeur. Hallisey was absolutely vehement in neither confirming nor denying that there is such a policy in place as the AAAaAA, and maintains that the team does everything to give all riders the opportunity to excel, regardless of whether their true talents lie in sprinting, cobbling, or opening a shop every other week for no particular reason.
Subscribers: 6
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Comments
Thanks guys, nice to hear!
AAAaAA. Very funny.
You gained a subscriber! Nice PR.
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